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It's ok to be afraid | a note on process and tenderness.

Updated: Oct 6, 2021


Firstly, you are loved.

Secondly, you are loved.

Thirdly, you are loved.

Fourthly (is that even a word?), it's ok to be afraid.

It's ok to be rage-filled, sad, angsty, joyful, billowing, twirling, or just straight up bewildered.

It's all ok.

But shouldn't we stay positive, stay hopeful, stay focused on the solution, stay loving and kind?

My humble invitation: This is a process. Like anything, art, grief, cooking, birth, death, we are dealing with a dynamic arc of human emotion and evolution, not a constant state.

Be gentle with yourself and honor your seasons. This is a process.

It's ok to be overcome with a lot of emotion, and it's no supposed to be pretty, or pulled together, or positive, or polite. In fact, the mess is where the healing starts. The mess is where vulnerability and connection lives, the broken earth where the sprouts take root, the crack where the light gets in.

This is not a time to stifle what emerges. This is a time to honor the truth of what is showing up in the body, and bring deep compassion, and tenderness to the truth of what's there. What is this asking of me?

By turning toward the suffering, we can access joy. We do not access joy by pretending we are not suffering.

When loving attention is offered to the truth of the emotion present, it no longer has you in its grip, and you are able to water the other emotional seeds of your choosing.

While there is a lot of talk about needing to not be fearful, my invitation is to honor the guest of fear, even make friends with it if possible.

Fear can't drive the bus, but it's guaranteed to be the co-pilot, and may not go anywhere for a while.

...and fifthly, you are loved.

With oceans of tender-hearted bravery and deep compassion,


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